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Simple ways to find a partner on FetLife


You may be new to the fetish community or have been a member of this group for years. It actually doesn’t matter. The truth of the matter is that finding like-minded people like you in this community won’t be that easy.

Indeed, there are so many platforms where you can meet and interact with kinky people. What you need to know is that not all these platforms are legit. And even if you find a legitimate platform, it won’t guarantee ease of use. 

This article reviews one site that makes it easier for anyone to meet a kinky partner. This site is FetLife.

What is Fetlife?

Fetlife isn’t a dating site like AdultFriendFinder. It is more of a social network platform where like-minded people meet.

If you are looking for a kinky partner, only a few sites have proven to be credible and reputable. One of these sites is FetLife. Of course, there are so many sites that claim to offer the same features as FetLife. But most of these sites are not competitive enough. 

It does matter what kind of relationship you want on FetLife. At the end of the day, you need to be hardworking enough for your profile to stand out.

In short, your profile should have everything it takes to attract other users. This starts by using a quality and attractive profile picture.

How should I set up my Fetlife Profile?

If you don’t post a good photo, very few people will view your profile. Remember that the site has thousands of users.

This is why it is important to pay attention to the little things as your profile picture. By this, you will stand a higher chance of getting your messages replied to.

Presently, most people believe that you need to be polite to find a life partner online. Whether you are submissive or not, politeness shouldn’t be something to consider.

It however does not mean that you should be disrespectful or rude. Everyone you meet at FetLife deserves respect. 

If you are submissive, expect to get so many messages from other people. Ensure that you thoroughly answer them. Take your time to confirm that the message is written well. Poorly written replies never get any feedback. 

And if you are looking for a submissive on this platform, what you need to know is that they also get a lot of messages. This means that you need to find ways to stand out when sending messages.

For instance, you can tailor a message based on the information you see on the person’s profile. Let’s take an example; the person is interested in pet play and you are also interested in the same.

Adding this small detail to your message can make a great difference. You can also conclude the message with a question that doesn’t need a yes or no answer. 

Also when chatting, try not to lose your cool. Any person that loses his cool will eventually lose in their mission. For instance, you should never send a rude message if any person did not give a reply on time. 

At this point, let’s look at some of the rules that you should never break at FetLife. By conforming to these rules, you will, first of all, be protected. And secondly, it will increase your chances of finding an open-minded partner like you. 

Security comes first

Yes, FetLife is the place to be when looking for a fetish partner. But like any other site, always be careful when online. 

As soon as you create an account, you have exposed your information to other people. So anyone can have access to the information you share.

They can see everything you are up to, and how other people are interactive with you. They will know who left a comment on your pictures as well as the pictures that you have commented on. 

Lucky enough, it is easy to prevent this by following this procedure:

  • Go to the main menu and click on update settings
  • Select privacy
  • Change the privacy information in a way that you feel will protect you

You can use a real picture of yourself. Bear in mind that other people can also use your picture. But you can let others protect you as well. 

Once you make friends at the site, plan to meet them in person. So long as you create a bond with them, they will also protect you.

For instance, they will be on your side if anyone harasses or embarrasses you at the platform. As we all know, the fetish community love protecting their own. 

You don’t need to be straightforward

Fetlife connects like-minded people who want to do kinky stuff. Some just need someone to have sex with while others are looking for a close friend.

You never know what another person’s intention is on FetLife. That said, be very careful when sending your messages or replies. 

Avoid sending nude pictures of yourself. Also, never assume that anyone that sends messages only wants to have sex with you. Again, not everyone who posts nude photos only wants to have sex with you. 

Post frequently

Keeping your account dormant will limit your chances of finding a partner at FetLife. Post your photos from time to time. ( you don’t have to show your face anyway). You can also play a part in community activities. 

Fetlife Creeps

Fetlife does not have strict privacy policies. Anyone at the site can check your profile and send messages. The best thing is that the private messaging section does not allow users to send images.

The site also hosts child predators that can send threats if you are not careful enough. Staying safe should be your main concern regardless of whether you are male or female. If you are suspicious about any member, ask your friends whether he or she is legit. 

How to enjoy your FetLife experience

It is easy and free to register at FetLife and connect with like-minded people on the platform. But there are limitations on what to enjoy if you use the site for free.

For instance, you have to pay to view videos that other people upload. Those living outside of the US and UK have challenges paying. But this will be easier if you use a VPN.

Fetlife in conclusion

Fetlife is one of the best places to be when you want to meet open-minded people. You can make friends and have a good time on the platform.

You can enjoy more by having a detailed profile in Kink community. Ensure that your profile picture attracts attention. Also, be careful of the details you post on the profile. You never know who is reading from Fetlife user.